My life: Handling grandparents with grace

Xiu Yen's Grandparents (my side)

New grandparents mean well. They really do. They just tend to mean well a little too much sometimes.

I try not to react too defensively or judgmentally if my parents or in-laws criticize my parenting style, dispense unwanted advice, or otherwise try to influence my choices for raising my baby. I'll Being confident in my own parenting skills will make these unsolicited opinions easier to handle. They may have more years of parenting experience than I do, but me and only me are the parent of this particular child, a fact I can (and may need to) gently remind them of.

 By the same token, the wisdom of their experience can be useful. Thank them for their input even as I graciously and clearly stick to my position, if it works better for me right now.


 As for spoiling my lil XIU YEN, I think that's just the job of a grandparents. My baby won't suffer from being held and loved, unless the extra attention routinely interferes with feeding and sleeping practices I've set up. Excessive gift-giving is sometimes a source of consternation for parents, but her grandparents usually do this out of genuine love and generosity. If there are strings attached, they're only as manipulating as I let them be. When I really object to something, I'll remember to start my response on a positive note. Thank to her grandparents for their largesse and, if I feel, I need to, kindly explain what I'd prefer for my baby.